Questions on concerts

Tomorrow I'm braving the thousands and taking my biggest little lady to see One Direction at the stadium. She is going to absolutely lose her mind. And her voice. I mean, it's a complete shame she doesn't like their music or have a crush on them, poor thing will have absolutely zero fun.

Ya, or not.

Ever since she heard that they were touring she begged me to take her, so after Santa had been, Christmas morning I presented her with a token to say we would be going to see them live. The noise that followed was like a really high pitched kettle just reaching boiling point over a hot stove. Yeah, a REALLY hot stove, she went nuts. In the best way, of course.

The past few months and weeks have been a constant countdown and to say she is just a tad excited is a total understatement. This week we have had a lot of opinions about the concert, mainly about our concert attire....

'Mum, I'm going to wear my white 1D too, do you think you should get one to match?'

'Okay, so if I wear my skinny jeans, will it go with trainers? Because I can't walk from Nando's in my pink wedges can I?!'

'I really think you should get a 1D top mum, otherwise you're going to be the odd one out there!'

'I was thinking to have a messy bun for my hair, because curls might get in my way, what'd you think?'

As you can see, she is totally angling for me to lose any of my remaining street credit by trying to make me wear a 1D merch shirt. Panic not, it ain't happening.

As for my actual outfit, I've yet to decide. What does one wear to a concert full of pre teens? I had the perfect white skinny outfit lined up, but in sheer excitement I just know that missy will spill something like cola and that will be the end of that story. So, tonight I will mostly be hunting through my wardrobe for an outfit that will suffice for such an occasion. It is after all the first ever concert I am taking Quartz too so naturally we will be instagramming the entire day! Ha. 

The roads are closed and trains will be a logistical nightmare, so best pray me and mini get out of the city quickly and easily! 

1000 gifts

It's been a while again hasn't it?

well, I'm never really sure how to begin again after an unannounced hiatus from the old blog, so I'll just dive right in. After months of being far too busy to read, I decided that I would venture into the library and immerse myself in a book that would bring me joy whilst reading it.

Would you believe that the first one I picked out was '1000 gifts - a dare to live fully right where you are.'
The book that nudges you to compile a list of 1000 little blessings in your life.

How perfect was that?

I started reading it just this week and to say it is speaking to me is a bit of an understatement. I'm at a time in my life where I'm doing a lot of processing- learning to handle parenting issues that I've never dealt with before, adjusting to being a divorcee, being a working mama and trying to launch a writing career and generally trying to keep all of the various plates spinning without burning out. So, to have a book practically yell at me to just take some time to pause and be grateful has been incredible.

Reading has often been medicine to me, and what others refer to as escapism, I simply denote as learning. You can't read a book and learn absolutely nothing, whether it's a new word, a life lesson, or even a self truth, books are notorious for stirring up your emotions and then softly soothing them again.

1. The smell of old books
2. The glow of a lamp in a darkened room
3. An old blanket

I try so hard not to complain, but in all honesty, sometimes I just do, because I'd forgotten to be grateful. Gratitude is a lesson, that means that you have to learn it over and over again before it becomes second nature, it's like love, you have to choose it consciously above anything else. What about when the children are running around the house screaming and shrieking and you're on countdown until bed time just so that you can hear your own thoughts? You have to choose love over selfishness, love over brashness and love over pride. Or, how about when your love snaps at you? You want to snap back, really, everything within you wants to retort back- you've even got a brilliant one liner quip all lined up on your tongue, but you choose love instead, and you know what will happen? The row that would have escalated quickly is completely diffused as you take a deep breath and say nothing.

4. fingerprints on windows
5. drawings of mammy by a 5yr old
6. warm drinks at bedtime

More and more I am realising that how we react to the situations we find ourselves in, is a choice. And, when you choose gratitude over attitude, your circumstances will be better, perhaps not instantly, but some day.

I'd gotten a few chapters in when I read this:

'Maybe you don't want a different story, because you don't know what a different end holds.'

And it stirred something so deep within me that I couldn't help but read that phrase over and over again. Isn't that just the truth? Even when we are fully in the throes of wondering what on Earth is going on in life, would we really want it any differently? Really?

I had an RTA and turned my head to look right to overcompensate for not being able to see that way, but would I really want to be any different simply to have avoided a miniscule bump? Would I trade lack of vision for the unknown? Would I rather have risked having a different impairment? No, of course not, so why was I lamenting over it?

7. an inquisitive mind
8. running at the gym

It's a slow process, but the more I jot down things that I love in my life, the more I appreciate how good I really have got it. The book is based around the word 'eucharisteo' which broken down literally means 'grace, thanks, joy' or 'gift, thanks, joy' Perhaps that's why after you recognise the gift and appreciate the gift, you're left feeling lighter, more optimistic somehow, perhaps Ann Voskamp is right, this is the way to uncovering joy.

After situations in your life leave you weakened and a little bit battered, it seems the only lasting way to regain your joy is to be thankful for what you have, because as the saying goes 'there's someone in the world who is happy with less than you have.'

9. silence
10. The hoot of an owl

She learnt a new song

Scarlette was in the back of the car whilst we were driving to pick Ben up, this was how she told me about the new song she had learnt at nursery.

Scarlette: mammy, I learnt the rubber dubber song aday!

Me: did you babe? Sing it for mammy.

Scarlette: yep okay, it goes:

Old mubber Hubbard went to the cupboard,

To get her poor gog (dog) a bone.

But, when she got there... There was a ... BEAR!!! 

So the poor little gog had none!

Hysterical.

Then she proceeded to tell me about the pet she met and stroked...

S: it was so cute mammy it was like a piglet that was a goat!

Which by the way transpired to be a guinea pig. Seriously, I could eat her up.

Kindness elf

The girls and I have been so excited for the start of advent, so this morning everyone started out the day on a real happy note. I'm not sure whether it's the anticipation of Christmas, or the fact they get to eat chocolate every morning when they open their advent calenders that makes them so, but I love seeing their little eyes light up. This week we have been talking about how Christmas is the perfect time to spread happiness and be kind to people, and when I asked them how they could show kindness, they came up with some great ideas, they included:

- Play with somebody who is lonely on the play yard
- Make a drawing or card to thank their teachers
- Giving a homeless person a blanket
- Sharing their sweets or chocolates
-Praying for the children who don't have mummys and daddys

Seriously, when they kept coming up with super generous ideas, it kind of blew me away. I thanked the good Lord, that perhaps I'm doing an alright job at this parenting lark, and told them that this month we were going to do those things.

I've been thinking of ways to get the girls to re-focus on their ideas during this exciting season where sometimes commercialism and 'wants' can get in the way of real needs. At first I thought we could make a jar and have one of them pick out a good deed each day, but then I saw a post on facebook in reference to 'the kindness elf' - it's an elf on the shelf alternative, and I think it is THE best idea for children to realise the true meaning of Christmas.

Today we said prayers for the children in the world who don't have mammys and daddys and my middle Princess piped up 'and please give those children nice warm homes and everything that they need for a great Christmas' and I about welled up.  I so hope that they remember these fundamentals not just at Christmas, but all year round. Teaching them to have an attitude of gratitude is high on my list of priorities as a mama, and as a person. Sometimes I can be all too quick to complain about something that isn't quite going my way, like the fact I did an entire re-stock of my freezer, only to come home to find my freezer was dead. True Story. If it was acceptable for grown ups to throw a tantrum, I think I most definitely would have, but really I should have been grateful that I had the money in my account to shop, and a home to come home to.

Tomorrow I am heading to Tiger to buy a little kindness elf who will 'write' notes to my girls each night reminding them of a good deed they could try and do that day. I'm so looking forward to starting this new tradition!

By the way, tomorrow is Giving Tuesday so, get involved, do something kind for someone for no reason at all, and don't forget to spread the word!

And then it rained, and rained, and rained

It has been pouring with rain for about a hundred days. Okay maybe just three days but it seems like so much longer! The drainage on my drive isn't great and so if I have to go ANYWHERE then my footwear default is set to 'wellies'- anything else gets sodden with sludgy leaves and soaked through from puddles. And I am done with ruining shoes since I've figured out how expensive my taste seems to be.So I've worn wellies for a hundred days and I am okay with that.

Except, that when I come home and take them off, my legs are aching like crazy. So much so that my thighs and shins think it's been leg day at the gym all week. Which is great, except that I haven't visited the gym this week, (I know, don't judge.)

So I finally think I understand how the people, who constantly wince when I wear heels, feel. Ouch. All the flat shoe wearing is a bit of a shock to the system!

My porch also seems to collect water, as when I opened the door to let cookie out around a pint of water fell in through the door and soaked my very cool elf slippers.

All this to say. I'm over all this rain.

Traditions to prepare for Christmas

It's nearly 'the most wonderful time of the year' again, and I can barely contain my excitement. I love, and have always loved, anything remotely to do with Christmas time. I'm the sort of girl who listens to her festive Michel Buble CD in October, and watches 'The Holiday' at least once a week from November. It is just all too exciting, and lovely and, well just wonderful. So to mark this amazing time of year descending upon us again, I thought I'd share some of my favourite Christmas traditions that I started with my wonderful kiddos.

  1. We go to see our town's Christmas light switch on, which is usually around mid November. The kids get a hot chocolate from starbucks and Mama gets a peppermint mocha or a Toffee Nut Latte and we are like a little red cup family, it's so fun to take a picture because Scarlette usually requests a caramel babycinno so the picture shows a very BIG cup (mine) two small cups (the big girls') and a teeny tiny cup (Scarlette's) it's like the three bears but cuter, because let's be honest, coffee is way better than porridge. We also have to wear scarves, hats and gloves (or mittens!) to said town because it is cold around these parts. I love to take a picture of the girls looking all wintery next to the big tree all lit up and splendid.

  2. We write a letter to Santa
I've never struggled with the Santa V Jesus debate that lots of Christian hosueholds seem to have, my girls know that Jesus is the entire reason we have Christmas, but Santa is a little fun that I like to encourage and indulge in. The girls write their wish lists and tell Santa how good they have been, and then they usually get a video response from the big man himself - I use the portable North Pole website, because it is realistic and magical. I sometimes also send myself one of those videos too, and usually Santa places me on the good list which is just brilliant. The Kids also post a letter to Santa, and as long as he receives it by December 6th, the kids get a personalised letter mailed back to them by the lovely folk at the Royal Mail North Pole.
 
3. I decorate the house on December 1st
Every year, on December 1st, after the kids are asleep, I set to work on decorating our home for christmas. I have a slight OCD about my Christmas tree which has to be decorated symmetrically on all sides and must have a new colour theme every two to three years. Last year it was red and gold, but this year it will be black and old gold, as I'm trying a more sophisticated twist. I will of course always include the kids' ornaments, and any baubles with sentimental value in every years display. I also set the nativity scene up complete except for baby Jesus, who appears in the manger on Christmas morning. The mantels get decorated too and a tree is placed in each window at the front of the door. Finally I add a wreath to our front door and buy a poinsetta plant. When the kids wake up, I take a sneaky snap whilst they are marvelling at the tree, which usually is the photo I use for our christmas cards.

 4. We have a girls only movie night
We started this one last year when we were an all-girl household for the first time at Christmas. I settled my youngest to bed after a festive fairy tale and then sat down with my oldest two to watch 'Elf' and drink mulled wine (me) and Hot cocoa (them) and eat a Terry's Chocolate Orange together, all snuggled under a big quilt. I also put the fire on and light some Christmas candles, then I turn out the lights and we have a cosy cwtch up.

  5. We make paper chains
Every year I try to involve the kids in some christmas crafts and every year I almost have a breakdown because of the mess that follows it.( Think reindeer cards made out of brown footprints of a 1yr old, a 4yr old and a 5yr old.) Paper Chains is one craft that everyone seems to enjoy that is almost completely mess-free! It also helps to make the kids bedrooms feel more festive too.

  6. We address Christmas Cards and then deliver them
We set up a little writing station of gold pens, red pens and christmas cards and then get to work writing out hand penned notes inside them. After we are through, we bundle into the car to deliver them to local friends and neighbours, and the children get to see the lights of nearby houses at the same time. (It also saves money on posting them with stamps!)

7. We go to my old school choir carol service.
Each Year my old high school hosts a carol concert at a church near my mum's house,I think it's super fun to go and see my ex teachers and support the school at the same time. We dress warmly since the church is old and very cold, and then we sing carols and follow it up with a mince pie afterwards.

 8. My mama and I head off for an overnight girls trip to a city in England
This is one of my favourite traditions. Ever since I got my first full time job, my mother and I have headed to Birmingham to do some Christmas shopping. We browse the handmade fare at the christmas market chalets and we shop til our feet can't take another step. We also enjoy a Nando's and far too many starbucks. We spend a night at a hotel and come home excited to see our people and wrap the gifts we bought. Quality mother and daughter time is the best!

Look out for Part 2 - traditions for Christmas Eve, coming soon!

A picture roundup

It's been a while since I've posted, mainly because I got sick and doctors had to put me on nerve meds to ease the pain and discomfort. Since it's gone nine and I just took them, I'm afraid a coherent post is pretty much out of the question, so let's do a little catch up in pictures...

Before I got ill, my little brother came to town and we went for a little brother/sister bonding session, which almost always includes Starbucks, shopping and a visit to Nando's, this time was no exception.

Watching the 'Great British Bake Off' always makes me bake something high in calories, but I impressed myself when I perfect a rhubarb and ginger crumble with vanilla ice cream. Yes, Mary Berry, it 'crunched' and didn't go soggy. Score.

My drive got super pretty all sprinkled with gold and yellow leaves, so much so I walked the dog in the rain, several times.

I found MINT m&ms in a bargain shop for 69p a packet. I bought two packs, but regretted my self control far I tasted just how amazingly good they are.

My middle girly turned SIX and I threw a frozen themed party for her. It was of course fancy dress and mama got in on the act too. Mama also got out of tidying the post party chaos because of aforementioned headaches.

I've never felt so cherished. Honestly. Being a mama is hard, but being a poorly mama is just plain rough. Unexpected bunches of flowers, chocolates for no reason and not having to fix dinner some nights has just blessed my socks off.

I got to cwtch baby Zakk to sleep, and smell his hair. And I was in my element. He is just too adorable to even describe.

The weather has turned really cold now so there's been plenty of snuggling on the sofa with my little loves